Day Four: Look Mom, No Helmets!

Hello again!

WELL, today was quite the day. After driving and driving and driving, we decided to spend a little extra time in one state and really get a chance to experience some local activities. And today, in the middle of Utah, we went WHITE WATER RAFTING!!

I have to say though, the odds seemed a little stacked against us. It felt a little bit like God was testing us, but we made it through. Here’s a quick recap:

1. We left in the morning and I realized I forgot my brand new water bottle at the hotel. I needed it because my co-workers from Carnegie literally bought me this water bottle SPECIFICALLY FOR THIS TRIP. Cue returning briefly to the hotel.
2. But no worries! We left early in case something went wrong. But oh no, we took a wrong turn and are now going the wrong way.
3. But NO WORRIES, the GPS will help us. Oh wait, wrong turn again.
4. It’s okay! The GPS says we will get there at 9:58 (2 minutes before the 10 am call time). Wait a second, we turned at the exit, but there’s no river?? There’s only a dirt road?? Help??
5. We called the place, no problem. We made a right instead of a left. Apparently this happens all the time with the GPS’s, something is wrong with the addresses.
6. We show up LITERALLY at 10 am and all of the families are already in their gear and listening to the SAFETY TALK ABOUT BEING ON THE RIVER.
7. So as we are heading over, this girl comes over and has us re-sign some waivers. I ask if they have helmets. The answer is no. This girl legit had the nerve to tell me I wouldn’t need a helmet as someone is standing on a boat pedestal explaining to us how to not die in the rock filled, rapid river. Ok.
8. We are putting on life vests but mine is too big, so the instructor gives me a smaller one and says “we’ll make sure this is tight later, listen to the rest of the safety talk” (we are already about 1.5 minutes into the talk and we missed it so far) (also she didn’t come back to check my vest but I asked someone else and I’m still alive so it’s fine)
9. LITERALLY TRYING TO LISTEN TO THE LAST FEW MOMENTS OF THIS RIDICULOUS SAFETY TALK AND THIS PHOTOGRAPHER IS TRYING TO TAKE OUR PICTURE. LIKE BRUH. I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO NOT DIE, THERE ARE NO HELMETS.

1. The safety talk ends, the main guy tells all of the groups to find an instructor who will take us to a boat. An instructor immediately approaches us and is like “I’m AJ! Need an instructor.” Like, yes AJ. obviously we do. (Jk he was actually really nice, I was just FRAZZLED and took it out on him in my mind)
2. We approach the boat and he LITERALLY SAYS “just to be honest with you guys, I’m training today.
3. I’m going to let you read that one again to let it fully sink in.

I am playing up some of this scenario for the ~dramatic effect~, but honestly this is pretty much how the morning went. But we were still so pumped to raft and didn’t mind that nearly everything that gone wrong leading up to this moment. So we hopped in the boat with AJ (and Dan who was an experienced instructor who was supervising AJ!)

And honestly, aside from getting ready super quickly, this was a completely amazing experience. I brought my GoPro and took some great footage, but here’s just a glimpse at what we were up to:

We also saw a real life, free roaming bald eagle. AMERICA, AMIRIGHT.

About halfway through the river, AJ told us we would be coming up to “concussion bridge” and would need to lay down in the boat. We were like “haha ok yeah” and then VERY QUICKLY REALIZED THAT WE WOULD BE DECAPITATED IF WE DIDN’T DO EXACTLY AS AJ THE TRAINING INSTRUCTOR SAID. This bridge literally had a foot and a half of space under it, and the boat was at least a foot tall. We truly feared for our lives. Please see the following video for the full experience (the first like 30 seconds are kind of boring but I promise you will see the bridge part) (also warning: there may be strong language in here, I don’t even remember, I just remember my life flashing before my eyes)

After that, we took a quick break on the side of the river to stretch our legs (and get over the anxiety we just built up). But we took some nice photos! And by we I mean Joey took photos of me because Joey and James didn’t want to be in any photos! I even took a picture of the water bottle I returned for, just to now have proof that it was on this trip.

Then, it was back on the boat for the end of the trip. The whole thing was 9 miles long and about 2 hours. No one died, no one fell out of the boat, so I’d say this was a win for us. I even bought the photos from the man who prevented us from hearing the safety talk. Here are a few highlights (for some reason my phone won’t let me download these so they are just screenshots, I swear this photographer dude was legit and took hi-res photos)

Once we headed back to the main ranch at the end of the journey, I made the boys take a picture together (this one’s for you Braccino family), and we took off for lunch in Salt Lake City!

I’m not going to lie to you, aside from lunch, Salt Lake City was not over favorite destination. But we had a great time at lunch and exploring a little bit of the town. I bought my first growler, which appears to be a literal jug filled with beer. I love him. He is a perfect jug. The beer is gone though. Anyway, Joey carried this around as we explored the Mormon Church section of SLC, which I found to be hysterical and wildly inappropriate. But I appreciate him carrying my new favorite jug.

Then it was on the road once more! We only had 4.5 hours to do in the car, but we went through the salt flats of Utah and it honestly felt like we were there for hours. It was literally nothing but SALT FLATS FOR SO LONG. And the wind was crazy, props to Joey for driving us through that crazy mess. don’t get me wrong, the salt flats were super cool but only for like a mile or so. And then everything was salt flats and we lost our minds.

Things got better once we entered Nevada, and now we are all settled into the hotel! We even had time to hang out in the pool and hot tub. And Joey finally got to eat some ice cream.

We’re heading to bed though, because we have an early start tomorrow. The Braccino Boys have decided that we need to have one more adventure before getting to the rehearsal dinner tomorrow. Where are we going?? What will it be?? Find out tomorrow!

DAILY STATS UPDATE:

• Number of States We’ve Been In: 10
• Miles Driven Today: 384 Miles
• Miles Driven Total: 2,543 Miles
• Cows Spotted: 4,555
• Hours in the Car Today: 5.5 hours
• Total Hours in the Car: 38.5 hours
• Chicken Nuggets Consumed: 68
• Windmills Spotted: 553
• State License Plates: 45/50 States
• Number of Musicals Listened to: 2